The old man is… If your principal and your sternest grandparent had a child born on the last day of summer before school starts, and that child grows up in the moment you realise you’ve been caught filching a cookie from the jar. In other words, he exists simply to remind you of all the bad things you’ve ever done, all the things you’ve ever failed at and all the mistakes you will ever make.
Definition: Bearing a sceptre; having authority.
Example: "If the Queen is sceptriferous, why can't she order some new hats?"
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*UPDATE 08/01/13 Sadly savethewords.org is no more, but if you love this word you can still adopt it by using it in conversation and introducing friends to it and other lost words*